Someone told me that a friend of hers asked her this while visiting her house. It shocked me to hear that someone would ask such a question in all seriousness. I know this type of parenting exists, but I suppose because I don't personally know anyone who abuses their children (uh, that I know of), I am still flabbergasted that a mother would ask another mother this question.
This is an extreme example of what you won't hear if you spend time with radical unschoolers.
If you've been moving towards radical unschooling, subscribing to email lists, poring over excellent sites like Sandra Dodd's or Joyce Fetteroll's, or even just contemplating unschooling (I recommend reading some John Holt books) but haven't been to a conference or met any unschoolers in real life, I highly recommend making an effort to do so. While reading online (and taking the time to contemplate the philosophy and trying things out) will get you pretty far, spending time with radical unschoolers will give you more clarity as you get to know families living a more trusting, peaceful and respectful (and let's not forget fun and learning-filled!) life. Aside from the national and regional conferences/get-togethers, there are local groups in numerous locations, or if you can't find any, start one yourself!
You also won't hear these said among radical unschooling parents (aimed at young kids):
- "When I count to 3... 1... 2... "
- "When we get home, you're going straight to time-out in your room."
- "Don't make me come over there..."
- "That's grown-up stuff."
- "If you get an A on the test, you can watch an hour of TV tonight."
- Excessive praise, the "Good Jobbing syndrome". (My favorite: a toddler girl tentatively pushing a train a couple of inches at a Barnes & Noble Thomas display, looking up expectantly at her mother, who enthusiastically responds "Good Pushing!!" Ack!)
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